Sometimes you meet someone, and you instantly click. There are no awkward pauses or lulls in the conversation – you feel like you’ve both known one another for much longer than you have.
But for those less seamless instances where you’re looking to get to know someone, knowing the right questions to ask people to get a conversation started is key. Maybe you’re new at work and need conversation starters for a fun way to foster connections with coworkers. Or perhaps you’re headed to a party where you don’t know many attendees, and want to have some funny random questions to introduce yourself and set the mood.
What kinds of questions to get to know someone are the right ones to start with? In her book Take Your Marriage from Good to Great, Terri Orbuch, Ph.D., suggests beginning with ‘getting to know you’ questions that are what she refers to as “breadth questions.” These questions aren’t overly personal, but also aren’t hypothetical questions either. Instead, they are questions that focus on a person’s biological story: such as their family history, chosen career path and marital status.
For example, you can ask what their favorite holiday is, or what the one food they could eat for rest of their life is. You can also ask what the best gift they ever received was, or even about the most ridiculous outfit they’ve ever worn.
You can’t expect to know every detail of someone’s entire life, but these fun questions to ask people are a great place to start getting to know them. This article will also cover questions to ask people in the workplace, funny questions to ask people, random questions to ask, and questions to get to know someone fast.
Whether professional or personal, platonic or romantic, present or past, relationships teach all of us valuable lessons, so it’s worth our while to try to develop them. No matter what social outing you’re headed to next, these “get to know you” questions to ask people will help you turn new acquaintances into friends.
These “get to know you” questions work well in just about any setting. An open-ended question invites more than just a one-word response and helps identify shared interests between those partaking in the conversation.
Here are some questions to ask that encourage deeper dialogue within a group. Try asking these questions to get to know someone at an upcoming event or social gathering.
Asking “get to know you” questions at work has plenty of benefits. Whether you’re managing a team or working your way up the ladder, knowing and appreciating the interests and background of your co-workers can help foster teamwork, and creates a stronger team dynamic.
It also makes showing up to work every day a little bit more bearable. Here are some get to know you questions to ask in the workplace that can go a long way in creating camaraderie.
Did you know that making someone laugh makes you more likable? Laughter releases endorphins (those hormones in our body that make us feel good). When you make a person laugh, they associate you with these positive feelings. Comedy can be a helpful tool in establishing new friendships. Here are a few “get to know you” questions to ask that are sure to earn a good laugh – and lead to engaging conversation.
If you’ve hit a lull in the conversation or want to change up the trajectory of the topic at hand, these are the questions to ask. Here’s a list of random “get to know you” questions that are funny and telling. These questions to ask people might just make you the party favorite, so be sure to use them wisely.
1. What’s the craziest thing you’ve eaten for breakfast?
2. What’s your most embarrassing story as a teenager?
3. What’s something you haven’t been able to cook?
4. What’s your favorite way to spend time alone?
5. Who was your best friend in school that you don’t see anymore?
6. What hidden talents do you have? Or what is your most useless talent?
7. What do you never leave the house without?
8. What’s the best thing that’s happened to you this month?
9. What’s the best purchase you ever made?
10. If aliens offered to take you back to their planet, would you go?
11. What’s your favorite board game?
12. What does your favorite wardrobe item look like?
13. What’s the oldest piece of clothing you have in your closet?
14. What would your superpower be?
15. If you could wake up with an unlimited supply of anything, what would it be?
16. What name would you have chosen for yourself?
17. If you could get away with a crime, which would you commit and why?
18. If you could teleport, where would you go?
19. Would you rather be the funniest or most intelligent person in the room?
20. Would you rather lose all of your photos or all your money?
We’ve asked interesting questions that can be asked in any setting, questions to ask people in the workplace, funny questions to ask people and random questions to ask people. Now, let’s take a look at questions to ask to get to know someone fast.
These open-ended questions may seem casual at first glance, but the responses will reveal more than you may think about the person you’re getting to know.
It can be challenging to talk about ourselves or see our best qualities clearly. Asking these type of personal questions helps get to know a person through the lens of their friendships and gets them thinking about how others who value their time and presence perceive them.
This “get to know you” question reveals a lot about someone’s personal growth and development and can show how far they’ve come in their journey.
Not only does this help you get to know someone’s family makeup, but it also reveals how a person feels about the traits they share with a particular family member. This question opens up the possibility of a deeper conversation, depending on whether or not they’re happy they’ve inherited this trait or are working to correct it.
Asking a get to know you question focused on recent accomplishments shows what a person values most. Putting a time frame on this question keeps the conversation relevant.
This is a great question to ask following the one above. We all have different motivators for what makes us feel accomplished, and finding out what generates that sense of accomplishment helps us gain a deeper understanding of what drives a person.
Whether you’re asking this “get to know you” question to a new acquaintance, coworker or even someone you may already know pretty well, this question reveals the crucial values to a person regarding their relationships.
Trust is earned. If your end goal of getting to know someone is to establish a long-term friendship or relationship, having this information up front will help you strengthen that bond.
This question helps you get to know someone by taking a glimpse into their interests. Bucket list items could be financial goals like owning a home, traveling to an exotic place or adrenaline-inducing experiences like skydiving. Knowing the answer to this question helps you learn more about a person’s hobbies and interests.
We all have something on our list that we just haven’t gotten around to doing. Asking this interesting question helps get to know what’s important to a person and what their current barriers are to achieving what they wanted to over a year.
Whether it’s by way of a wedding or a new baby, welcoming new members to your family is an exciting topic to talk about. This question helps you get to know a person’s current family dynamic.
This “get to know you” question can inspire deeper conversation depending on the context behind why a person is closest to a particular family member. Perhaps they grew up in a single-parent household or were an only child raised with lots of cousins.
How a person responds to this question, when phrased this particular way, can be very telling. Maybe this person was offered a second chance, and it made a huge difference in their life trajectory. Or they offered someone a second chance, only to end up regretting it.
No one likes to admit when they’re wrong. But this “get to know you” question helps reveal a person’s self-awareness on how they react when they realize it.
We all have our insecurities, but how we face them says a lot about us. Ending the question with “and why?” invites the person to share how this trait may have held them back or impacted them in life, which can help build intimacy between two people.
If you’re getting to know someone who you’d like to spend time with again in the future, this is a great question to ask that will help inform future plans. If this person struggles to identify a recent time where they did something without planning it, you may want to ask and establish a plan to spend time with one another in advance, rather than reach out spontaneously.
Taste in movies and literature is subjective. This is an interesting question that will likely reveal a particular experience that the person shares with the plot or characters in the film or book, which can help you get to know them on a deeper level.
Having a support system is crucial. Hearing a person talk about the go-to individual in their life who will listen no matter what helps to understand their personal relationships better.
This “get to know you” question helps you get to know what’s truly important to a person, what they value and why.
The answer to this question might be something small – like finding $20 in an old jacket – or tremendous, like an engagement or new job. If the person you ask this question to responds with “nothing ever exciting happens to me,” encourage them to dig deeper.
Having a favorite teacher is a universal experience we can all relate to. This “get to know you” question may bring up a funny story from childhood or an impactful life lesson that has stuck with the person.
Social connection is essential to our overall health and well-being. Studies have shown that solid relationships correlate to a higher rate of happiness. However, as we get older, fostering new friendships and relationships tends to feel more difficult.
Dale Carnegie, the author of How to Win Friends and Influence People once said, “You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.” Talking about yourself at a party or group setting will only get you so far, but expressing genuine interest in the lives of others goes a long way in establishing new social contacts, expand your network and grow your social circle. This is why having “get to know you” questions ready to ask can be beneficial.
Asking “get to know you” questions can help get you interested in others to make new connections and grow relationships. Keep this list of questions to ask handy the next time you find yourself in a scenario where you’ll be meeting new people – or have the potential to grow your social connections. You can make somebody else feel heard, and that curiosity will go a long way! Seize the moment.